Friday, July 3, 2015

I Love This, I Hate This

Today is six months!

Today is when I should be saying I'm halfway through my year in this country!

Today I have less than a week before I return to the States!

My head is spinning with emotions!


I booked a ticket a few weeks ago. July 9th. That is my return date. I fly Frankfurt to Miami and Miami to Denver and then I'm home. This doesn't feel real.

I'm torn between two different halves. One half is stoked to go back, get a job, move in with some buddies, buy a car, build a grown up life, and start supporting myself for real. Being in communication with different people about different potential jobs is exciting for me. Skyping friends and talking about potential autumn living arrangements has got me so stoked for my future.

I love this.

The other half gets super emotional whenever I do anything here because I realize . . . it's the last time I'll get to. I've been to the island on the lake for the last time. I've been to worship practice and sung with the band for the last time. I went to that cute little ice cream place in Rosenheim for the last time.

I hate this.

I've never been one to swing back and forth between two ends of any spectrum but that's kind of what I've been doing since I found out my adventure was getting cut short. I think I kind of feel like there isn't room in my mind for everything I'm feeling right now.

At the end of the day, I know that Papa's plans are good. I know that He's got my back, no matter what that looks like and I know that my going back early is for my own benefit.

I'm just . . . really going to miss it here.

Be praying for things to come together and as always, thank you for your love and support. You really are rockstars.

I'll see you soon.

xoxo Charity

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